Don't Know What You Want? 10 Simple Steps for Creating a Personal Vision Retreat

Last month I told friends I was taking a few days off to go on a vision retreat, and I realized people had no clue what I was talking about.

"Is that a course you're taking?" someone asked. Good question.

Vision retreats are about charting our own course, for our life, our own way.

Most of us weren't taught to step back from the drone of our lives and reflect on whether or not we're happy. We're too busy living.

For many people, once the work day is done, bills paid, birthday party planned, legs shaved, and dinner made, we're too exhausted to even think about the next day, let alone envisioning a different future. We're just happy we made it through alive.

When we're super busy it can seem pointless -- even frivolous -- to go off dreaming about some future reality.

Ironically that's the time a vision retreat is most crucial.

When we're suffering from busy-sickness, time-poverty, career confusion, or lack of fulfillment, it's time to stop and look at the bigger picture. We don't need to wait until we get sick, make a careless error, or something falls apart to examine where we are and where we're going.

Whether you're retired, a single parent, student, school teacher, business owner, or managing a bustling family, a vision retreat can help you get clear about what's most important. It can help you find clarity to make the shifts you've been dreaming about.

Here are 10 thoughts on creating a personal vision retreat of your own.

1. Schedule It Now. Book it, or it won't happen. Schedule one day, a few days, or even a week, whatever feels right for you.

2. Don't try this at home. This is key. You might think you can vision in your house, but getting out of the familiarity of your surroundings allows your mind to think in expansive ways -- and you won't be tempted to do the laundry.

3. It doesn't have to be expensive. If a big trip isn't practical, pack a picnic and go to a quiet park with your journal for the day. Turn off your phone.

4. Go alone. Giving yourself space and quiet allows your heart to speak more clearly. You'll also be less distracted by conversations and other people's agendas. This doesn't apply if you're going on a vision retreat for your marriage, joint business, or co-created project. If the idea of going alone feels scary or selfish, more reason to do it and overcome fear. You are worth it.

5. Relax. The longer the retreat, the more breaks you'll need. I like to practice yoga, go for walks, use inspirational card decks for creative ideas and support, eat healthy delicious food, nap, dream, or journal.

6. Plan Your Agenda. Give yourself tasks to work through. Here are some ideas:

- List 10 things that feed your soul, personally and at work. Circle the ones that are most important to you.

- Write down the broad categories of how you spend most of your time, for example family, friends, work, nature, health, household, volunteering, hobbies, social media, etc. If you want to get fancy, make a pie graph of what your main tasks are on an average day.

- Go from the broad to the specific. If you wrote "family," what are you doing exactly? Are you hanging out, making meals, shopping, or driving kids to sports? If your vision retreat is focused on your career, write down your specific work activities.

- Circle the specific activities you would like to eliminate or do less of (see #7).

- Let your imagination go wild. Brainstorm how you can do more of the things you love, and less of what you dislike. Write down ways you could make small changes in your life now.

- Write out actionable steps you can take toward your goals, and put them into your day planner.

7. Honor Your Feelings. Don't talk yourself out of how you feel. If you hate cleaning, but you don't have a clue how you could eliminate it, just acknowledge your desire. Notice if you don't want to admit that you hate writing reports at work. If you can't even admit this to yourself, how can the Universe give you something different? Getting honest with ourselves is healing, and it's okay to ask for what you want.

8. Get Coaching. For longer retreats, bring along an inspirational audio-program, online mini-lecture, or meditation created by someone you admire. Or schedule a morning coaching call with your mentor each day to be guided through your vision process. Usually the first person that comes to mind is the right choice.

9. Stomp on the Box. Don't just think outside the box -- there is no box. Here are some questions to help you think big: A) If the world were to end next year, would you be happy about how you spent your time? B) Are you sharing your gifts and talents in the best way possible? C) Think ahead one year. If your life is exactly the same as it is now, will you be happy? D) What do you want people to say about you after you die? What's your legacy?

10. Let go. Remember this quote "The fastest way to make God laugh is declare your five-year plan." Planning gives us direction, clarity, and purpose, but ultimately we are co-creating with Spirit. Don't use this quote as an excuse to just go along with whatever comes, but do recognize that sometimes there is a better plan than the one we vision for ourselves. The point is to get clarity about our goals, and take action to achieve them.

Getting clear about what we want -- and don't want -- is an important first step in creating change.

I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below. When you're 103 in your rocking chair looking back on your life, what will make you smile out loud?

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1JUI5Cy

Breaking the Silence: Mental Health Awareness Month in Beirut

Feeling empowered by the success of our recent mental health event at the American University of Beirut, volunteers from our mental health awareness group (WA3I/وعي) spoke with hundreds of high school students this week in Beirut to help open minds and erase stigma related to mental illness. As far as we know, our event Tuesday at the International College (a high school in Beirut) was the first time in Lebanon -- and possibly the Middle East -- that a group of speakers shared their personal mental health struggles before a high school audience. It was the perfect way to mark Mental Health Awareness Month in Beirut.

From the stage, our volunteers spoke in detail about issues never discussed in Lebanon in public: suicide attempts, self-injury, hospitalization, eating disorders, alcoholism, and drug addiction. Breaking the silence around these taboos is no minor task -- some revelations were met with gasps. With bold honesty and compelling humility, these brave speakers opened a door to dialogue and understanding.

In the question-and-answer period that followed (moderated by school counselor Dana Taher Mirza), one student asked how to be a good support for a struggling friend. Another asked if medication alone can bring relief. From the audience's positive feedback after the event, we realized we're on the right track. Around the world, awareness raising sessions like ours have been shown to increase mental health literacy and favorably influence the attitudes of young people.

My inspiration for this venture came from my experience volunteering for "Ending the Silence" -- an educational program of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). When I helped run this program in New England, we arranged for volunteers of all ages to speak about their personal struggles with mental illness at high schools throughout Rhode Island and Massachusetts. Similarly, our WA3I awareness volunteers in Beirut are reaching out to young people in Lebanon to put a human face on mental illness and eradicate the stigma associated with it. Because our first high school event was so well-received, we've already received a number of invitations to do future events just like it.

In addition to the usual pressures of growing up, young people in Lebanon are forced to contend with a host of literal and figurative triggers: ISIS gun battles on the Syrian border, deadly explosions on the Israeli border, and suicide bombers blowing up in Beirut. In addition to the current chaos of the Syrian war, young people in Lebanon also live with the legacies of the Lebanese civil war. By advocating for more acceptance of mental health care, we're trying to help those who are struggling with mental illness -- or just the difficulties of daily life -- to get the support that they need.

While on the surface our mental health awareness work in Lebanon looks like an innovation, it's more like a reclamation -- since the first mental hospitals in the world appeared in the Middle East. In the medieval cities of Baghdad, Cairo, and Fez, the earliest psychiatric hospitals treated whomever was in need of care, and set no limit on the length of a hospital stay. Treatments included medication, recreation, rest, aromatherapy, music therapy, comedy performances, and even massage with sweet musk and myrrh (and chains when needed). One 10th century medication I came across in my academic research on this all-too-often forgotten topic was named: "the key to joy from every sorrow and the gladdening of the soul" (مفتاح السرور من كلّ الهموم ومفرّح النفس).

Since our young group in Beirut is the first public advocacy collective in Lebanon composed of people living with mental illness and their allies, we've been forced to contemplate a range of related issues: the Americanization of mental illness, the shortage of mental health professionals in Lebanon, the lack of insurance coverage for mental illness, local media coverage of suspected student suicides, the high frequency of migrant worker suicides in Lebanon, gender disparities in global mental health, and the general dearth of disability discourse in the Middle East. It's been thrilling and inspiring to watch these young trailblazers connect the dots.

Raising awareness about mental health is not just a regional imperative, but a global one. Mental illness affects people of all ages, and cuts through all race, class, gender, ethnic, and religious divisions. Our group alone consists of college students, graduate students, professors, and mental health professionals from a range of different backgrounds in Lebanon, Tunisia, Western Armenia, and America. In the sectarian minefield that is Lebanon, I've seen through our mental health events and my volunteer work at St. Jude's Children's Cancer Center in Beirut that coming together to confront physical and mental illness is one of the most effective and inspiring ways to transcend difference and find commonality in the vulnerability and mortality we all share.

Over the past few years, I've been saddened to see some of my students in Lebanon attempt suicide to escape their pain. I never could have imagined that I would eventually team up with them, as we've done this year in Beirut, to reach out and persuade others to get help. A constant refrain I'm now hearing from young adults in Beirut is: "We can change this -- our generation is different and more open-minded." Let's hope so -- because like so many other things in Lebanon, this too is a matter of life and death.

To learn more about WA3I, follow us on Twitter (@WA3ILebanon) and Facebook, or contact us at wa3ilebanon@gmail.com.



___________________

If you -- or someone you know -- need help, please call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. If you are outside of the U.S., please visit the International Association for Suicide Prevention for a database of international resources.

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1RkXcr3

The Secret Diet Health Industry Professionals Don't Want You to Know About!

I would like to introduce to you the holy grail of diets: One that guarantees permanent weight loss and improved health one hundred percent of the time. One backed by decades of medical studies and clinical research, including exhaustive triple-double-blind studies yielding equal results each time. For years, nutritionists, dietitians, and other health professionals have been aware of this diet and its incredible efficiency, but never before has it been revealed to the public... until now.

The diet I am referring to is the CD diet, a secret among health industry professionals. Although the CD diet has been written about extensively in almost every major health and fitness publication, you are most likely still unaware of its existence. Due to the strength of its effectiveness, it is intentionally hidden under multiple names in order to mislead those that seek it out most desperately - the yo-yo dieters.

For the first time ever I will expose the hidden face of the CD diet and make it clearly recognizable to you so that guaranteed success may be found within your dieting efforts. The true form of the CD diet can be acknowledged under the aliases of the Paleo diet, the Vegan diet, the Gluten-free diet, the Mediterranean diet, the Intermittent Fasting diet, the Small-Frequent-Meals diet, and many others. Because they all work! All of the time!

At this point you are probably extremely confused and wondering to yourself, what exactly is the CD diet, and how can all of those contradictory diets use the same thing and guarantee equal results one hundred percent of the time? That's because the CD diet is composed of two magical words: consistency and discipline. Applied to any diet, consistency and discipline will guarantee you your desired outcome every time (within reason of course).

The Consistency and Discipline diet is the key to unlocking permanent, life-changing results. It is the only thing that explains how one person can lose weight eating a high carbohydrate and low fat diet, while another person can lose the same amount of weight eating a low carbohydrate and high fat diet.

It is not a matter of whether the Vegan diet versus the Paleo diet works better for weight loss; rather, it is a matter of which of those two diets work best for YOU -- and that's the diet that best suits your lifestyle, allowing you to stick to it in the long run.

Now that the secret has been revealed, the difficult part is choosing which one. This is particularly challenging because "best for you" has multiple meanings. The diet that works best for you is going to be the one that suits your lifestyle, budget, schedule, and the limitations of your self-discipline.

For example, one diet popular amongst millionaires is the PC diet (private chef diet). This diet consists of private chefs who pre-prepare gourmet meals designed to meet specific health goals. It has proven extremely effective and the results are lasting. But if you are not a part of the wealthy elite group that can afford this service, then this might not be the best option. Your budget cannot sustain it.

Likewise, many people have heard that eating small frequent meals is the best means for weight management. But if you are someone with an insanely busy schedule and limited opportunities to eat throughout the day, the stress of trying to squeeze in six smalls meals will most likely not be a sustainable diet plan.

Selecting the diet that works best for you also means choosing the one that best suits your body type. If you are someone with a slower metabolism, then the vegan diet might not be the best choice because it is generally higher in simple sugars and carbohydrates. Those two nutrients are the most easily overeaten and commonly result in weight gain. This is due to the fact that most simple sugars and simple carbohydrates are higher in calories and less filling.

The solution to this problem is simpler than it may seem. It initially requires an investment of time and energy to get to know your body type and to figure out which dietary habits are sustainable for you. Don't be discouraged by this step. Of all the things one can choose to invest time and energy into, health deserves to be towards the top.

What works best for most people is a middle of the road approach. The extreme dieting types like the ones that omit hours of the day you can eat (intermittent fasting) or eliminate whole food groups (Vegan, Atkins, Ketogenic) are the least likely to be sustainable. It is difficult to continuously apply consistency and discipline to these intensely restrictive diets.

And it is the consistency and discipline that are critical for longevity.

When the consistency is lost, so are the results. Maybe you shed 10 pounds on your 7-day juice cleanse. But after a few happy hours and endless h'ordeuvres, you'll gain an additional 15 pounds back by the end of the month.

Equally, if the discipline is lost, then the goal is likely never to be obtained at all. Many people attempt the Ketogenic diet -- which excludes all simple sugars and carbohydrates, including those from fruit and 'high sugar' vegetables like carrots, beets, and tomatoes--hoping for expedient weight loss. This hardly seems sustainable for a life long dieting practice. For most, this can be religiously followed for about a week, maybe two for the super-dedicated, and then a sugar craving emerges and all of the progress made goes out of the window following a pizza and ice cream binge.

Choose a diet with guidelines by which you can apply consistency and discipline. The decision could be as simple as minimizing processed and packaged goods in order to eat more whole foods like fruits, vegetables, nuts, and meats. Save the alcohol and sweets for the weekend. This easy common adjustment is often referred to as a 'detox'. However I recommend against holding this perspective. Detoxes are not the language of permanent behavior change, because a detox generally has an end date.

In order to develop lifelong, healthy dieting practices, permanent behavior change backed by consistency and discipline should be your new goal. By making small positive adjustments to your diet, you can eventually transform the way you eat in order to create a healthier happier person.

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1FdTOGC

10 Things Dr. Seuss Can Teach Us About Life

I've always been a huge fan of Dr. Seuss. His stories provide a great message on many different levels. As a parent, the morals I found within his writings enabled me to teach my kids many valuable lessons. As I got into the business world, it was me who learned invaluable lessons as I read quote after quote from Dr. Seuss.

Life can be funny, from here and to there
And success is a sliver as thin as fine hair
So how can you find it, searching high, seeking low?
Precisely how to grip it, it's so hard to know
It's the ultimate quest we search for each day
In clue corners and hint houses the answers they lay
I'm quite sure the solution can be found here by you
Through the quotes of the creator of Thing 1 and Thing 2
So read on blog readers, keep your brains nice and loose
As you study the musings of that man Dr. Seuss.

"Think and wonder, wonder and think." -- Dr. Seuss
Take time to get deep in your thoughts. Expand your "what-if" possibilities. You can accomplish great things if you give yourself freedom to spend time thinking about the limitless possibilities.

"Only you can control your future. -- Dr. Seuss"
Although you will have lots of supporters, cheerleaders and guides along the way, it is you that is in control of your future and no one else. Don't rely upon others to believe in your dreams more than you do. Your future belongs to you and it is up to you to control it.

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." -- Dr. Seuss
Don't just do. Care as well. Be conscientious, mindful and caring when you take your journey. There will be many delicate things in your wake. Be aware of your surroundings and while it is great to have focus, don't lose sight of the role you play in making this world a better place to be.

"Adults are just outdated children." -- Dr. Seuss
Don't forget to have fun. Be playful and enjoy life. All work and no play leaves little room for fun in your life. Have fun and enjoy the ride.

"Whenever things go a bit sour in a job I'm doing, I always tell myself, 'You can do better than this."' -- Dr. Seuss
There will be times when things go perfectly well. And then there will be times when things aren't perfect. Understand, you have plenty of room for improvement. Be open to make changes along the way. Be flexible enough to make changes quickly. Be wise enough to know when change is needed.

"Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" -- Dr. Seuss
Being unique, special and totally YOU is awesome. There is no one better at being you than you. When you play your role well, with confidence and without hesitation, you will succeed not just in business, but in life as well.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world." -- Dr. Seuss
There are people in this world that need you, including your kids, your family, your friends and your supporters. Never lose sight that you may only be one person, but you are very important person. You have an impact in this world and it is impressive.

"Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple." -- Dr. Seuss
Don't get so caught up in asking so many questions that you don't move forward for lack of knowing all the answers. You will never know everything. Keep moving, keep smiling and keep loving life as you take your journey.

"A person's a person, no matter how small." -- Dr. Seuss
There is no such thing as an insignificant life. Everyone from the stockroom employee to the CEO plays a vital role in business. Stay humble, keep humility in your heart and keep your ego in check. Never look down upon someone and feel you are better than they are. The bigger your position within an organization, the more aware you need to remain of everyone on your team.

"And will you succeed? Yes you will indeed. 98 and ¾ percent guaranteed." -- Dr. Seuss
Think it into existence. Goal setting, visualizing and charting your path from here to there are essential steps towards success. You have greatness within you and you have control over your future. The only reason you will not succeed is if you quit. Stay in the game, have a positive attitude, stay consistent and be persistent. You will succeed.

You've got this, quite surely, success is your friend
It's not hiding from you, it is just 'round the bend
It's your job, you see, to keep up the pace
We know you're a winner, so go win this race
Life is a journey, for all of us here
We've got feelings and emotions, we've got worries and fear
If we do it together and walk hand in hand there
From the bottom of our toes, to the top of our hair
Be a lover of life, work hard and play harder
Ambition and good luck come to those who are smarter
As we finish this story of Seuss and his words
May your dreams soar to heights with the highest of birds.

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1FdR9wL

How Do You Want to See the World?

When you leave old thinking behind, anything is possible.

-- by Linda Bloom

I am a recovering pessimist. I grew up in a family that had a basement freezer crammed with food and cases of canned goods stacked against the walls. All this hoarding was preparation for the economic or political disaster that my parents were certain would occur.

I grew up hearing stories about my grandfather's assault on a Russian army officer who had taunted him with anti-Semitic remarks. As the story goes, he then fled and deserted the military, leaving Russia to emigrate to the United States. There were stories about the pogroms and violence that occurred in the old country, particularly on Easter Sunday, when angry neighbors took it upon themselves to punish the "Christ killers." There was also a steady stream of stories about all of the relatives who perished in the Holocaust because they didn't leave Europe in time.

My parents' caution was well-meaning, but it left me with a sense of anxiety and a pervasive belief that doom and catastrophe are always right around the corner.



When I left for college, I thought that I had been admitted by mistake, and didn't think I would graduate. I expected failure. I expected to fall in love but also that I would probably be left by my beloved. But I had no idea that my general attitude was deeply pessimistic -- I just thought it was realistic.

By studying psychology and human development, I came to understand that we all form protective beliefs, and that these beliefs can be modified. What a concept! I put the theory to the test and was delighted to discover that it was actually possible for me to change my thinking. With concerted effort, my rich imagination -- which had been catastrophizing -- started to envision successful outcomes for the scenarios I anticipated.

So much of my happiness now is a result of my efforts to put my inner pessimist in his place. When he sneaks onto the scene and starts spinning his fearful scenarios, I know that he is just doing his job to protect me by preparing me for trouble. But these days I talk back. I say things like, That may or may not happen. Thank you for sharing, but I choose to believe that things will turn out well.

I've had losses and tragedy in my life; every life has to contain its share of joys and sorrows. I have come to trust that it is possible to make a full recovery from some ordeals, and at least a partial recovery from the even most devastating blows. To waste precious life energy worrying about what might happen is unproductive and can even become self-fulfilling. I now know that I have choices. I still have to exert effort when pessimistic thoughts arise. But with experience and practice, it has become easier to trust that things generally do work out--and not necessarily in the way in which I expect.

Some people see optimists as "Pollyannas," believing they are in denial about reality. Of course optimism can be taken too far. But those who criticize optimists are often pessimistic themselves, and believe that they are stuck with their attitudes for life. Maintaining optimism as a life view is a much more harmonious way of living. Despite some negative experiences, I see people as being basically good, the universe as a friendly place, and nature as trustworthy. So much of my energy that used to be used defensively has now been freed up for more creative pursuits.

If you think that your own beliefs and attitudes are fixed, I challenge you to reassess, and dare to believe in the possibility of transforming the darkness of pessimism into a more hopeful outlook. Working with our attitudes and beliefs is an essential part of cultivating the art of joyful living. Don't take my word for it; give it a try and see for yourself. You may be in for a pleasant surprise.

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1Evh3KQ

Liquid Diets Are Not My Cup of Tea

Who remembers Carnation Instant Breakfast? You just needed to add milk or water to these nutritious, artificially-flavored, sugar-laden meals-in-a-packet. My mother drank them before she took off for work. I drank them before I took off for school. We both tolerated the taste in the spirit of fast, nutritious and calorie conscious consumption. It's still in the marketplace along with an assorted other liquid meal options.

Flash forward. Today, I dread the idea of liquid meals. They remind me of being ill or watching my sick father consume Ensure (also a nutrient-dense but sugar-laden drink) during his hospice days. Sure, I enjoy drinking smoothies, sipping soups and hydrating with fresh juices. But I also find pleasure through mastication, so I can't tolerate the idea of a living on a liquid-intense diet for my nutrients.

What amazes me is all the smart, healthy people who are turning to liquid meals as replacements for the real deal meal. My inbox is flooded with offers and books on juicing-detox diets. The health food stores stock shelves filled with powdered concoctions to boost your metabolism, add protein and help detox your system.

The last straw to hit me is an article in the May 25, 2015, edition of The New York Times on how time-pressed Silicon Alley entrepreneurs and wonks are drinking liquid meals by the gallons. Who has time to eat when you're working on the next big tech thing? This quote really struck a nerve with me:

"The time wasted by eating is, in Silicon Valley parlance, a 'pain point' even for the highest echelon of techie. Elon Musk, Tesla's founder, once said, "If there was a way that I couldn't eat so I could work more, I would not eat. I wish there was a way to get nutrients without sitting down for a meal."

This is comment from someone who is considered a thought leader. I'd like to see him put the brakes on the idea that eating is a waste of time. In auto talk: Eating provides fuel for your body. Why would you put second rate fuel in a first rate body?

Too busy to eat? What kind of message does that send? More important, think about the cracks it puts in the family table, the art of dinner conversation and the pure pleasure of consuming a great meal?

Juicing loyalists says a fresh liquid diet boosts your energy, cleanses your system and makes your skin glow. I've tried juicing, meal replacements, energy boosting drinks and protein packs all in the spirit of health and wellness. I'm not knocking what I haven't tried, and I really have tried to go the juicing route. I just don't find the appeal of a liquid meal as pleasurable as eating -- and chewing -- real food. I'd rather boost my energy taking a walk outside, doing yoga, getting a good night's sleep and eating a delicious meal prepared with farm fresh vegetables and fruits and lean proteins.

I'll take a gnaw over a straw any day, I enjoying masticating my food and plan to do so until the day comes when I have no teeth. Chew on that!

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1JUtlTW

The Coffee Complex

For many of us, coffee is what gets us out of bed in the morning. It is the magical substance that gets us going -- that gets us doing. According to the National Coffee Association's 2015 Survey, 59 percent of American adults drink coffee on a daily basis. Admittedly, I am one of these people.



My first exposure to coffee occurred at a very young age, when I was maybe 6 or 7. My mother has been an avid coffee drinker for as long as I can remember, and she used to let me sip the watery remains of her iced coffee once she was finished. As I got older and entered teenage-hood, my father would brew me hot coffee to go, which I would take to school in a silvery thermos. Then my obsession with Twin Peaks inspired me to try black coffee, which I began ordering at cheap diners, drinking the piping hot liquid out of thick mugs.

A little over two years ago, my relationship with coffee changed drastically, as I began to experience chronic fatigue as a result of a viral illness. Caffeine became a form of self-medication more than anything else. Today, the promise of a jolt of energy remains all too tempting. When my energy level is artificially improved, I begin to feel more like my happy, authentic self. I can "do" things: make a phone call, go for a short walk or hang out with a friend. I can feel somewhat productive.

As someone with chronic fatigue, I often wonder where I fit in to our culture of productivity. Our society, generally speaking, is result-biased; we are rewarded for the things we create or achieve externally (i.e. earning a diploma, getting a new job, writing a novel, buying a house, etc.) While all of these milestones are wonderful achievements to be celebrated, I can't help but think how our result-oriented society is rather exclusionary. What about those who are not able-bodied, for whom brewing a pot of coffee in the morning is a struggle? How can we measure their self-worth?

One alternative would be to place introspection on equal ground with external achievement. Imagine a world where people were praised for attending to their mental (and physical) health before they were celebrated for landing that promotion. A world where simply "being" was as important -- if not more important than -- "doing." A world where "feeling" was on par with "thinking."

This may sound like an absurd, utopian vision, one that is quite un-American. After all, we are a nation of doers, achievers and coffee drinkers. But I would like to see us find a balance between the internal (our thoughts and feelings) and external (our actions).

Perhaps a more realistic goal would be to redefine "being productive" on an individual basis. For some, being productive might mean getting out of bed in the morning. For others, the same could mean writing a ten-page paper. Embracing this fluid scale of productivity would empower those who do not fit the able-bodied stereotype. Eventually, we could begin to break down the shame perpetuated by ableism.

So how does this all relate to coffee?

Unconsciously, I have been using caffeine as a means of conforming to the ableist ideal of productivity. This can be dangerous, as drinking coffee can actually lead me to overexertion. In other words, I am fooled into thinking I can do more than my body is able.

I don't know when or if I will stop drinking coffee, but I will begin to use the substance with more awareness. I will allow myself the time and space to heal both my body and mind. I will give myself permission to do only what I can, and to feel a sense of accomplishment even on days when I do absolutely nothing. I will step back and simply "be."

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living Blog on The Huffington Post http://ift.tt/1JUtiYu